It took six days.
Six days of waiting, wondering, spiraling a little—and finally, the CT scan results were uploaded to MyChart.
Justin was beyond mad. Rightfully so.
I was already on edge. I called the new Miami doctor’s office and lost it.
“I need the results uploaded immediately. The scan was six days ago.”
No one should have to fight for this kind of basic communication. But here we are.
Sitting With Uncertainty
The truth? I had already started preparing myself for the worst.
Endoscopy. Biopsy. Surgery.
I had made peace with the idea that this was going to get a lot harder before it got better.
But now?
Now I’m not so sure.
The suspicious cyst might not have grown.
The tumor markers—still elevated—but only half of what they were before, in 2020.
That has to mean something, right?
Could it be a fluke?
Or maybe just a reflection of everything shifting in my life lately—the move, the new routine, the thick Miami humidity that’s been messing with my blood sugar and throwing me off in ways I can’t quite explain?
I’m in a new world. My body knows it, even if I’m still catching up.
Gratitude in the Noise
In the middle of all this, something beautiful happened.
People showed up.
Texts. Calls. DMs.
Love. So much love.
It’s overwhelming in the best way. I don’t have the words to properly thank everyone who’s reached out—but I feel you. I’m carrying your support with me.
And Justin—he’s next to me every step.
We’re stronger together. And that strength is everything right now.
Some Kind of Calm
I feel…calmer today.
Maybe it’s the calm before the storm.
Maybe it’s something more grounded—knowing something, anything, instead of floating in that horrible limbo.
We’re heading toward a biopsy. Toward answers.
And while that’s scary, it’s also powerful.
Knowing is powerful.
A Note to Anyone Else in the Thick of It
If you’re going through something—waiting, worrying, getting brushed off or delayed—hear this:
You are your best advocate.
You live in your body. You are the expert. You know when something is wrong.
If you’re not being heard?
Find another doctor.
Full stop.
No one will care more than you do.
So speak up. Fight for the answers.
And don’t apologize for being relentless when it comes to your health.
You may just end up dead if you don’t.
Meredith's Musings 
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